I have to let you all know that I wasn’t going to post this, but I searched & searched for another blog that would describe what I’m going through…there don’t seem to be any. So, I guess I’ll be the first.
That bandage symbolizes something completely new in my life, something that other women might take for granted. That bandage means I had my birth control implant removed, and we are officially planning for another baby.
I know that might seem silly to some of you out there, but I’ve genuinely never experienced this before.
I have had the privilege of having two beautiful, healthy boys but neither pregnancy was planned. I have to say, I can see the advantage of “surprise” pregnancies. Planning means time to think, and thinking about pregnancy is overwhelming.
Early in our marriage, my husband and I set some specific goals for ourselves before we would talk about another baby. Grown-up things like having plenty of money for bills, food, etc. Things like home and health insurance and savings. And we actually met those goals this year plus some! But babies are more than money.
Sure late nights and diapers are a consideration, but for me there has also been exhaustion and terrible, crippling morning sickness with the last two boys. Add that to homeschooling, taking care of a toddler and truly being on our own for the first time (without my mother’s help) and I kind of get freaked out.
I honestly don’t know how people ever plan for children.
It’s a completely surreal feeling. I am ecstatic, and terrified, I wish there were more people that could understand this!
So, when I showed up at the doctor’s office, I was nervous about the actual procedure. I wasn’t really thinking about the consequences, but as soon as I handed in my paperwork to the awesome nurse at the desk, it dawned on me: I would be able to have another baby! And from that moment on, I had such a goofy grin on my face.
My excitement carried me through getting my arm sliced open, and all the way out the door. I headed straight to Walgreen’s and picked up my own version of a “planning for a baby” kit to add to my daily vitamin.
I keep flashing from super excited to super nervous to mild panic to longing for this next baby to be in our lives already.